Monday, November 29, 2010


So I decided to start a blog about my weight loss journey. I am getting a Lapband on 12/13/10. I am getting prepared for the surgery. I've had all the tests and the lessons and everything. Hopefully everything goes as planned since it's been pushed back a number of times. I am a little scared, but I think I can do this. Hell, I've done EVERYTHING else to lose weight in my life, and I am completely burned out on all those things, so I think this will be a good tool to help me lose weight. I ideally want to lose about 120 pounds, then see what I feel like at that weight. 

It is totally depressing reading the guide about how I get to eat pureed beans and various mushy things for a month, gross! But, I guess I will probably lose a good amount of weight in that first month, which will give me the incentive to continue. I just did my last "real" grocery shopping yesterday, and that made me sad, and more scared. But, crap, food is expensive, I will have much more money now to stalk Kris Allen and various other American Idols hahaha.

I start my liquid diet on Monday the 6th. So let's see how that goes. 2 full weeks of NO FOOD AT ALL. Sounds awful, I'm sure much complaining will ensue. I am pretty good with "rules" and things, so I'm thinking overall having the band will help. Because I won't want to cheat, and get sick by eating the wrong things.

Working out is going to be the hard part. I hate it! Who likes it? Who wants to run around and be out of breath, and get sweaty, nothing enjoyable about that, I did it for years and years and hated every single second of it. Then I always feel like it's not fair, I have super skinny friends that don't work out for hours and hours a day. Ugh, jealous!  Hopefully I can get into it, and maybe drag some of my friends and family out with me to go hiking or to a class or something.

I guess I'm a little worried I will feel weird when I lose weight. Since I won't be able to eat to cope with things anymore? I mean I don't really have any "issues" in my life, but I'm afraid I'm going to find one when I'm skinny! Though, all my troubles and anxiety I have now, probably has to do unconsciously with my weight. Hopefully my panic attacks will die completely, and hopefully I can score a great new job with out discrimination. Also it will be good to fit comfortably in a movie theatre seat, or an amusement park ride, or an airplane. And to buy clothes that fit comfortably, and that are cute and cheap! Things you skinny people probably take for granted everyday. 

Ok! so I got that out there... please feel free to comment and give me some support because I am going to need it.



  1. Good Luck Heather! I will pray for you. I just went through two surgeries, try not to think of the bad stuff that could happen. Just think how much stronger you will become. I have anxiety myself so I can relate to your feelings. As far as exercise your right who likes it? Maybe that will change for you once you start to lose weight.


  2. I wish you the best of luck, Heather! I know you will do just fine. I, too, did a lot of research on the lap band for myself but decided it wasn't for me. But in the research I did do, I found that it works amazing for a lot of people! I know how it feels to be on all sorts of diets and have them fail. It sucks. The best advice I can give you is to take it one day at a time. One day over with is another day done! Just keep looking at the end result and how amazing you will feel (and all the things you will be able to do "easier" like you mentioned.) Before I lost a bunch of weight a couple years ago I felt exactly the same because I feed my emotions as well. But once you start feeling and looking so much better, you won't WANT to mess it up, you know? And I think exercise will be the same way. Once it gets easier to do you will slowly find yourself looking forward to it. This is pretty touche, but just keep in mind that "nothing tastes as good as skinny feels". I'm starting my low-carb diet in January (I want to lose 100 lbs as well,) so we should be eachother's support group! You have my # so txt me ANY time! =)

  3. Thanks Debi :)

    Thanks Kim, yea it is a big step. We should definitely be a support group haha. Yea, I think this will all be easier once I start doing it.