Monday, January 23, 2012

Liquids woohoo

Starts today, gross *drinks protein shake*. I'm getting a fill on Thursday, so I am doing (mostly) liquids till then, I'm going to have a small lunch, mainly to keep up appearances at work, and so I don't go completely insane haha. Hopefully this will get my brain in the right spot.

I set up inspirational reminders on my iPhone to beep every few hours, nerdy, but I think it will help me :)

I read something the other day, from some doctor online and  it say the goal of the lapband is to see how little food you can eat, not how much food you can eat. That makes sense, you can make it a game! That might work for me. I mean I'm definitely less hungry so I should be able to get by with less. I see so many people posting "but I can still eat x amount, why?" well yea, because it's not gonna stop you from eating, it has a hole in it haha. Don't try. Hell, I know all the junk I eat, it definitely doesn't stop me from eating. Sure, like yesterday I ate WAY to much, and it feels like $hit, but I can still do it. I think my fill will scare me enough to start being careful again. At least I hope! I've never had any issues with my band, maybe it will become a little more restrictive...

Well, cheer me on people! I need it!


Monday, January 2, 2012

Hey Everyone!

Phew, it's been a while.  Obviously because I've been eating crap for 6 months.  :-|. I feel pretty crappy right now, my clothes don't fit well, and I'm just uncomfortable, I want to start losing again. Last year was a HUGE roller coaster for me, and apparently I turn to food when I am sad, and when I'm happy. The first 6 months of last year were horrible, the worst of my life by a mile. The last 6 months, were pretty great, like a complete 180ยบ, and now I am in a really good place. Great new job with great co-workers, new apartment, new car, it really can't be much better. I'm trying to get a hold on things now. Maybe if I start talking about it again, people will hold me accountable.

I'm going to get a fill later this month, so I'm starting off by getting back on a low calorie diet. I'm pretty scared to be honest. My doctor scares me, the fact that I've gained weight scares me, and the fact that it's been so long since I've eaten properly for my band scares me. I'm looking at my old food logs and trying to get back to that. So far so good, even though it's been one meal haha, and I'm going to exercise after I type this. I bought the Extreme Makeover Weight Loss DVD, might do that, if anyone can motivate me it's hottie trainer Chris Powell haha. (BTW it's a great show, watch it when it comes back)

I'm looking to deal with the mental side of all of this, anyone have any suggestions? I'm kinda weary of doing a support group. I don't want to sit in a circle with 10 women talking about what I ate today, and how I was so tempted to eat those brownies, but I resisted!!  lol... Are there psychologists that deal with WLS, or dieting exclusively? Where would I even find that?

So to my bandsters that still read the blogs, how are you doing?